The "there's another chick around the corner" is a huge lie in player community. Maybe if all you want for a relationship is a generic, follow-the-crowd chick, with generic views on the world which she adopted and never gave a thought, then yes.
But if you're me, which I didn't realise at the time, I have specific needs - some form of non monogamy, don't want to live in the same apartment, has to think for herself (smart), has to have some sort of spirituality that she can explain rationally, has to like sex and not use it as a weapon/game inside the relationship, has to be artistic in some way, have fun with me ona minute to minute basis... etc... Then the amount of girls who meet these criteria is pretty small. I also tend to prefer girls who are introverted because otherwise their extraversion fills too much mental and physical space which makes me unable to flourish.
It may sound like i need to "reduce my expectations" but really once a certain "human" and "ethics" standards have been set its extremely hard to let go of because it feels like a moral failure to myself.
To find such girl u need to be aware of demographics and use them, right now I'm in a tight spot but I know it's mostly useless to use OLD for this purpose, more likely festivals and other art-filled events are to generate opportunities.
Thing is, I have ALWAYS been very selective and had an innate, subconscious filter for girls, and many just don't pass. It's not to boast about this, it's just the fact that I lose interest in a woman if she plays games and/or isn't aware of them, or is in other way personally or morally dishonest, or isn't conscious of it. And I can't feign interest for a longer time than maybe couple of weeks. Too short for a flourishing relationship, no?
Also one important thing about relationships that is omitted in player spaces is that generally people flourish and develop faster in them than single.
Brother, I feel ya. As obviously intelligent as you are, you will not stall by being in the same place a few years from now. Looking forward to your story as we go along. Looking back at all the prettys, I found a feminine one with a better sense of humor than most women, and now unfortunately realize that was MY killshot that I did not take.
The "there's another chick around the corner" is a huge lie in player community. Maybe if all you want for a relationship is a generic, follow-the-crowd chick, with generic views on the world which she adopted and never gave a thought, then yes.
But if you're me, which I didn't realise at the time, I have specific needs - some form of non monogamy, don't want to live in the same apartment, has to think for herself (smart), has to have some sort of spirituality that she can explain rationally, has to like sex and not use it as a weapon/game inside the relationship, has to be artistic in some way, have fun with me ona minute to minute basis... etc... Then the amount of girls who meet these criteria is pretty small. I also tend to prefer girls who are introverted because otherwise their extraversion fills too much mental and physical space which makes me unable to flourish.
It may sound like i need to "reduce my expectations" but really once a certain "human" and "ethics" standards have been set its extremely hard to let go of because it feels like a moral failure to myself.
To find such girl u need to be aware of demographics and use them, right now I'm in a tight spot but I know it's mostly useless to use OLD for this purpose, more likely festivals and other art-filled events are to generate opportunities.
Thing is, I have ALWAYS been very selective and had an innate, subconscious filter for girls, and many just don't pass. It's not to boast about this, it's just the fact that I lose interest in a woman if she plays games and/or isn't aware of them, or is in other way personally or morally dishonest, or isn't conscious of it. And I can't feign interest for a longer time than maybe couple of weeks. Too short for a flourishing relationship, no?
Also one important thing about relationships that is omitted in player spaces is that generally people flourish and develop faster in them than single.
There's always another chick down the corner, but at some point the endless chase feels pointless.
Brother, I feel ya. As obviously intelligent as you are, you will not stall by being in the same place a few years from now. Looking forward to your story as we go along. Looking back at all the prettys, I found a feminine one with a better sense of humor than most women, and now unfortunately realize that was MY killshot that I did not take.
Part of being a player should be knowing when to quit, which hasn't been a strength of mine...