One more time

Seeing the twenty-year old again, after some effort

(First published in 2018.)

Did manage to see the twenty-year-old again last night. She's been difficult to get out but great when she's actually out. I keep thinking that she's playing games, but when she shows, she doesn't shit test.

I got to thinking about things I read online, when guys construct these epic stories about frame and getting around girl bullshit and girl psychology and so on. Those stories are sometimes very good. Sometimes, though, girls are just genuinely busy, or sick, or have things going on in their lives.

The twenty-year-old may be playing games, or she may have someone else she's pursuing, or she may be busy, sick, or have an extensive social life. Or all four. Or she might be flakey. On average younger girls are flakier. Sometimes girls tell the truth and aren't playing games, so a guy's effort to decode what she's "really" doing is futile, because there is no code.

That point may not be profound, but I have been guilty of over-thinking. I think about my own life. Often, I'm just… doing things, and sometimes okay girls fit into them, and sometimes they don’t. If a girl I think is okay wants to come along, great, if she doesn’t, I may let her drift off.

Girls do the same, sometimes.

The twenty-year-old has also been apparently willing to meet at times when I haven't been able to. She doesn't initiate meetings, but in my experience many chicks don't or won't.

(I'm deliberately omitting a few revealing details that make my point make more sense.)

I feel like if I posted this little story about the twenty-year-old to forums, the participants would get on me about being "too beta" or her "not being that into me" or the other things guys on forums say. Sometimes those things are true. Sometimes, they're not.

She's difficult enough to get out that I'm basically giving up on her, or more realistically just pinging her when it's extremely convenient to me. It's somewhat unusual for me to see a chick so responsive texting but not meeting. And my texting is pretty disciplined and focused on meetings. Usually chicks either ghost or progress. Being kind of in-between is unusual for me. Most chicks are pretty keen for the second shot, so this one is weird for me.

I wrote two weeks ago that

I’ve felt the overwhelming urge to over-contact her. I know intellectually that to give into that urge is a mistake (the same urge I felt with the girl in the last third of this post). Any time I start to think about her, and the crush brewing, I have to stop myself and ask the key question, “Will you sending her something right now raise your chances or lower them?”

That urge is gone now; I've lost momentum. I don't even have to do texting discipline. The intense desire to be close to her is not really there. I don't send her much beyond "let's get together" or "you missed out on doing this thing we talked about." If girl game is about getting the guy to commit and invest, her girl game is awful… and that may explain her dating history. A lot of girls who want boyfriends but don’t or can’t get them, and who then blame men for that, have one of two problems, 1. poor girl game, or 2. dating guys with much higher SMV.

Don't get me wrong, being with the twenty-year old is still nice. GREAT p***y. But that intense feelings rush has been harmed by her behavior. Even girls with decent bodies and good p***ies can turn me off through their actions.